Admin

Women's Division 2 Team 1: Season Preview

Let me introduce the Bullets Div 2 Team 1 coached by the one
and only French queen Pauline! Much like their coach this team appears sweet
and nice but when they step onto the field you’d be foolish to get in their
way.

Let’s begin with our middles. First, there’s DJ Sash one of our most experienced players. This veteran plays as hard as she party’s and loves finishing a try in style by diving for the line. Keep a look out for her this season as she tries to bring back bitch braids. Second, there is Sandra. While Sandra deliberated a club swap earlier in the season, she eventually saw reason and decided to remain loyal to the Bullets. With acceleration and speed equivalent to Usain Bolt’s she is one you can’t miss on the field. Third there is Jenny To who likes to show off her fitness by wearing park run merchandise to training. You can spot JT on the field wearing visors day and night and throwing the longest of long balls. Fourth, we have Jaime, our very own private school girl. Ja'ime decided to make a career swap this year from the Roosters to the Bullets and boy are we happy to have her. Born in 2001, this young gun has moves beyond her years and will be sure to show the veterans how it is done. Finally, there is the captain Anna, who envisages herself as the next Bella Burns. In true Bella style, you’ll most likely see her rocking up to games on her new bike. However, she’s got a way to go as her bike still has the training wheels on.

Next, our links. First, there is Emma D, the veteran leading
all of our newbies who are taking on the link position. Emma runs the slickest
of sweeper lines and has the smoothest of scooper pick-ups. You will be able to
hear the sounds of her pump-up playlist in the distance a good 10min before she
arrives. Next there is Keely, another member of our team who has realised that
Bullets is the place to be (sorry Sharks). Keely loves a wild party, and that’s
why she decided to attend her grandma’s birthday instead of uni games this year.
However, we forgive her when she does killer runs down the sideline getting us
those much-needed meters. Third, there is Nicole. As a new player Nicole is willing
to learn and always gives 110%, but rumour has it she’s reduced a few refs to
tears in social games so who knows what to expect on the field. Fourth there is
Laura T. Laura has learnt the ropes quickly and runs the perfect line when
subbing on, setting up the team for a textbook finish to the set. Fifth, there
is Meera, our specialist doctor/player. With Meera in the team the rest of the
girls will be playing fearlessly knowing that a medic will be quickly on hand.

Last but not least are our wingers. There is Lippy, the mum
of our team. Having formerly played in division 1 she brings great experience
and wisdom. You’ll be able to hear Lippy from a mile away as she guides our
team through the perfect box set. There is also Laura M. Laura enjoys
fraternising with the enemy and getting us inside tips on the Roosters.
However, on the field there is no question where her loyalty lies as she
shutdowns our opposition with some killer wing D. Finally, there is Mon, our
drama queen from NIDA. While she is a star actor, everyone is expecting her
greatest performance to come from this season!

This team had a bye in the first Vawdon round, giving them
extra time to train and an edge on the other teams. So make sure you keep a
look out for these girls this season, they guarantee an exciting game (and
hopefully a Div 2 Championship!).    

by Admin

Men's Division Two: (Late) Season Preview

The initial Men’s D2 submission was initially rejected by Bullets Website Overload, Count Fenji. Post this rejection the Men's D2 team was mercilessly reminded that, ‘this is compulsory.’

The Men's D2 team comes off the back of arguably its most successful season to date, after a Vawdon Grand Final appearance and a State Cup Title, both expectations and positivity is high for our 2019 campaign.

Round 1 got our season underway in the right direction with a 6 - 4 win against Ryde @ B-Town. A very strong start saw Men's D2 up 5-1, however, a brief period of weak defence saw the final score not a true reflection of the game. Lessons learnt for the rest of the season.

This year’s squad has been marred by controver-say, with Sensei Say’s ex-roommate, fresh from Italy, Special Agent Kelly, making a late showing at training this week. Some question his fitness after eating copious amounts of Gelato and not having any time to exercise due to his rigorous social media campaign, that we all had to endure.

His lack of fitness will be offset by State Cup Men's D2 MVP, Hasso, who, after making his Premier League debut last week, was remarkably fresh (and clean) after the game. Obviously showing how extremely fit and balanced he is being able to ensure a full 40-minute Premier League game with such ease and cleanliness.

The controver-say continues with rumours circulating of a Men's D2 faction having alignment to another, unsanctioned touch football media outlet. The club wishes to take this opportunity to advise that any players violating their mandatory exclusivity clause with https://www.unswtouchfootball.org.au/ will have their contracts terminated with UNSW Touch immediately.

This reporter will not make any further comments at this stage.

End Communication

by Admin

Women's Division Two: Season Preview

Vawdon touch football Fridays are back and the third women’s squad couldn’t be more pumped. After poaching players from various social and representative teams (shout-out to Balmain Tigers for donating almost a quarter of the team) the squad is filled with the best and brightest around. Headed by coach Bri Anderson who plays div one women’s for the club, we’ve chosen Justine Mackenzie’s border collie puppy, Joey, as our team mascot to intimidate and psych out our opposition. Since no one seems to have been able to figure out how to make the whole bullet mascot thing work, we’ve chosen this terrifying ball of fluff as the next best thing.

We may not be in the top squad but we work hard and play hard. While we definitely have a reputation to get around club events, most of the team train both at the mandatory session and optional skills, while also playing at multiple park competitions throughout the week. Shout out to Meena Subramanyam who flies to and from Melbourne every week and still manages to make training work, and to Su An Hui who had to get stitches after a particularly intense pre-season scooping drill. Don’t sweat it though, she’s now recovered, locked and loaded to head up our wingers' squad.

To start off we have Cassie, team playmaker and speedster, known for stepping all the boys at Monday night social. Jenaya Goodacre also brings her soccer skills, in both her fancy footwork and explosive running off the drive and through our line attack plays. Our other middles are Abby Friend and Lindsay Bennett, who love to chat on and off the field and are truly the on-field communication glue the team needs – particularly when Sophie Petersen Tym whips out the rugby terminology to send the whole team into confusion. 

Justine, apart from bringing team baby/ terrifying mascot Joey, is one of our lightning fast links. A bullets veteran, both she and Emilie Tremblay are our main girls to take off from dummy and burn the defence on the inside. Also a long-term member of the Bullets family is Seraphina Brown, who’s had a position switch-up this year and moved into link to bring both her amazing defensive and communication skills.

On the other hand, we have a fair few newbies in the team too, including Natalie Chiu, Naomi Halim and Kim Nguyen. Each of them have proven themselves to be crazy quick learners and huge assets to the team. Though they haven’t been at the club long, we can’t wait to dominate the field as their untapped potential is let out by star coach Bri and they really come into their own.           

Of course, we can’t forget about our wingers, who are central to the whole operation. Ama Anwar and Kat Jansen are both irreplaceable, screaming at us to get back onside and communicating the touch count when it all gets a bit hectic in the middle of the field. Though not actually a winger, we can’t wait to showcase Vanessa Tan’s super speed as she burns the opposition on the outside during the box drive to convert try after try.

In a nutshell, despite being a relatively fresh team we’re excited for a successful season of tippity tap and good times. To sum up our hopes and dreams for the season, in the wise words of tennis legend Serena Williams: 'We’re really exciting. We smile a lot, we win a lot, and we’re really sexy'.

by Admin